California dreaming...

I leave bright and early tomorrow morning for a work trip to California.  It should be relatively stress free, and I am actually very excited to get away for a few days.   But, of course, i will miss this cute little guy SO MUCH while I am gone! 

Through better or worse...

I usually do not write about "negative" things on my blog, but, honestly, that is because every time I start to feel negative about something, I then think about all of the wonderful things in my life and how very blessed I am.  This has been a rough week--a rough year, really, for Frank.  He lost his job on Monday.  I know that he has experienced a whirlwind of emotions this week, from shock, to anger, to regret, to sadness, to worry, to hope.  He was working in a job that was not right for him, that did not challenge him, that did not make him happy.  I see this as a wonderful opportunity for him to find something better.  I see this as a chance for Frank to use the MBA he earned and to find a job he is passionate about.  We so lucky that I have a wonderful job that more than supports our family, and Frank has the luxury of being able to take his time to find something that is truly a good fit for him and our family.  For that, I feel so blessed.

However, this recent development has also exacerbated the pressure I feel being the primary breadwinner in our family.  I am now fully responsible for paying our bills, keeping us in our house, and getting things ready for Baby Lily.  I am struggling with trying not to feel angry about this responsibility.  True, I have always been the main income earner in our house, and I have always felt a sense of pressure and responsibility because of this, but now, the pressure feels greater, and I resent that.  I feel like I should get to have control of all of our money, and all of our decisions about money, because I am the one who is earning it.  I have so many mixed feelings about this situation, and I am really struggling to remain supportive, hopeful, and sensitive to Frank. 

All of this is coming, ironically, as I am also looking for a new job.  I actually love my job, my firm, and my work, and I love the people I work with.  However, I feel like I am being treated extremely unfairly with my compensation, and I am not okay with that.  My boss is working on the situation and I am hopeful that we will be able to work something out that allows me to stay and be treated fairly, but at the same time, I am very angry about the situation, and part of me just wants to walk away and find somewhere else that will compensate me fairly.  I feel silly complaining, because I already make a lot of money, but when you are working just as much (and receiving extremely positive performance evaluations) as your peers, but making a LOT less money...that is not fair, no matter what your income bracket is. 

Anyway, although my job is not perfect, I am very thankful and so happy to have it right now as our family faces this new challenge.  I pray that Frank finds a wonderful new opportunity that fulfills him and gives him the opportunity to shine that he deserves.  I pray that I can remain supportive and hopeful as he embarks on his job search.  And I pray that our family stays strong and loving as we prepare to welcome our newest member in June.  I am very proud of my hard-working husband, and I know that he will do everything he can for himself and his family. 

Baby Lily

I am just over 24 weeks pregnant, and I have definitely POPPED!  I have had a lot of people tell me this week that I "finally look pregnant," which is hilarious to me because I think I look way way bigger than I did at this point last time.  Baby Lily is kicking up a storm, and both big Frank and Frankie have felt her kick. I am feeling great right now, and I hope this continues!  I have still been craving cheese and spicy food, but now I am also craving ice cream, red velvet brownies, and chocolate.  I have my next appointment in a week, and we will get another ultrasound to take a look at baby's kidneys and make sure she is still a girl.

We are finally starting to make some preparations for Baby Lily.  I bought my first baby purchase last week, and they are ADORABLE!

Of course, I had to buy my baby girl a pair of designer shoes to start her wardrobe.  I have also received several sweet baby girl outfits from friends this week, and I absolutely cannot wait to dress my baby girl up in them. 

Last weekend in Houston I went to look at baby furniture and bedding with my Mom and my Aunt Barbara, and I found some stuff that I love.  The next step is to decide which room we are making into the nursery, start painting, and order furniture.  We are torn between converting the guest bedroom into the new nursery or converting the playroom into Frankie's room and turning his current room into the new nursery.  I cannot wait to get started!

Dinosaurs!

A couple of weeks ago, Frank took Frankie to go see dinosaurs in Glen Rose, and they had a blast!  I was sad to miss this adventure, but I am glad that they got to have a good day of father-son bonding.  And Frankie got to take home his new stuffed dinosaur named Rex, who he now sleeps with every night.  On another note, I used to always read Frankie books and then sing him a couple of songs before he went to bed, but now, he is requesting that I tell him stories instead of sing to him.  It is so cute!

Here are some pictures from Frank and Frankie's dinosaur adventure:

Weekend at Nana and Papa's house

We had been planning to go to Houston this weekend because both Frank and I were supposed to have to work there all week.  My hearing was cancelled after my case settled, but we decided to come to town anyway to see my family and spend some quality time with Nana and Papa.  Frankie was so good this weekend!  We noticed a HUGE difference in his behavior from the last time we were there over Christmas.  He listened better.  He played with his new toys for long stretches of time.  He (mostly) avoided the plugs, phones, and other things he tends to get obsessed with.  He was great!  We had a great weekend visiting and catching up with my Aunt Barbara.  On Saturday night, Frank and I cooked a big enchilada feast for everyone.  We each made a different recipe (I made black bean/spinach enchiladas and he made crab and shrimp enchiladas), and then we made everyone vote on which one was better.  I WON (and it was unanimous)!  It is probably the first and only time that my cooking has been better than Frank's, but I will take it. 

On Sunday, I went with my Mom and Aunt Barbara to look at model homes in Sugar Land.  Frank and I have been talking a lot lately about the possibility of moving to Houston.  Obviously, there would have to be jobs changed, a house sold, and a lot of other pieces would have to fall in place in order for that to happen.  And I LOVE living in Dallas.  But, for the first time since we have been married, it is a real possibility.  Frankie absolutely adores his Nana and Papa, and it would certainly be nice to live closer and be able to spend more time with them. 

Happy Valentine's Day!

I am so thankful that I got to enjoy a wonderful Valentine's Day with my sweetheart.  I have been working like crazy for the last month or so, expecting to go to a big arbitration hearing next week, and then yesterday around lunch time we found out that the case settled!  So instead of having to work non-stop for the next 10 days, I got to leave work at 3:00 and spend some quality time with my two valentines.  Frank and I went to a wonderful dinner up at the Four Seasons, and I finally bought him the gun that I had promised to get him last Christmas.  We had a six course meal, including two dessert courses.  I was so incredibly full when I left, but it was delicious!!

Baby Liliana Mae

 Well.....it's a GIRL!  We had another ultrasound today at one of those 3D ultrasound places, and the tech spent 15 minutes looking at our precious baby from every single conceivable angle and concluded that she is indeed a girl.  We are so excited!  (I think I am a little more excited than Frank, but he will come around eventually).  Her name is Liliana Mae.  Liliana is the girl's name we had picked out for baby #1, and we both still love it.  Liliana is Frank's sister's middle name, and Mae is the name of one of frank's great grandmothers.  I am so excited to have a beautiful little girl to dress up and spoil!  This baby just got a whole lot more expensive, but as my friend Corey said, she is worth every penny!  I cannot wait to go shopping and to decorate the nursery.

I had speculated from the beginning that this baby was a girl, but I was afraid to get my hopes up and so I never let myself truly believe it was a girl.  I think Frank also believed this baby was going to be a girl (he even had a dream about her!), but he really really wanted another boy, so I think he convinced himself that it was going to be a boy because that is what he wanted.  

I have been having a really tough time at work lately, and I really feel like God has given our family this wonderful gift as a reminder of what is most important in life.  As long as I have my wonderful husband and healthy children, my world will be complete. I hope my daughter will grow up and admire her hard-working mommy and see that she can be absolutely anything she wants to be when she grows up.

Pink or blue?!?

We went back to the doctor today for my 22-week appointment and a follow-up ultrasound.  At our 18-week appointment, the ultrasound tech did not get as good of a view of the heart as they would like, so that is why we were scheduled for another ultrasound.  At that appointment, the tech told us that we were having a boy.  The doctor told us that the tech had written boy? on her notes, so she said she must not have been 100% sure.  But, she told us she was "98% sure" we were having a boy, and we have been planning for a boy ever since.  We have been calling the baby Luke and imagining our future with two little boys.  So imagine our surprise when we go into our ultrasound today and the tech tells us he is 100% sure we are having a GIRL!  He asked us right away if we already knew the sex, and we said yes, but that the girl was not completely sure so we wanted him to confirm for us.  Frank joked that I had been holding out hope that we were having a girl.  He started the scan and asked us if we had done the previous scan at the same office, and we said yes.  He checked the heart, the femur, the brain, and all of the other organs, before saying, "well, Micala, I think you are going to have a pretty great weekend, because you are definitely having a girl."  Frank and I were both SHOCKED.  We could not believe what we were hearing, especially hearing him say that he was sure.  He said that he could tell right away, which is why he asked if we had the previous scan at the same office.  He also told us that he has never been wrong.  After we had the ultrasound, we met with the doctor for my appointment and she told us that it definitely looked like a girl to her too.  She told us that the tech we had today is much more experienced than the tech we had originally, so maybe that caused her mistake.  So....we are really confused.  I am really excited about the possibility of a little girl, but at the same time, I had grown excited about having two little boys too.  We are scheduled for another ultrasound in four weeks, but I am not sure if I can wait that long to find out, so I may go ahead and book a 3D ultrasound to find out sooner.  

Here are the two different "confirmation" pictures from the two appointments...which one looks correct to you??  Are you thinking pink or blue?!?